Forget ‘New Year, New Me’, Here's Why The ‘Seek Discomfort’ Mantra Will Actually Change Your Life

No one in education ever tells you how much power sits outside the boundaries of your comfort zone.

As we make an understandably anxious entry into 2022, it seems that reflection is on the cards for everyone in a more cautious way than the previous throwaway “new year, new me” slogans. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say it’s time to trade the saying “new me” for “new life.” It’s evident the coronavirus pandemic has given the world food for the thought. Never did we, even for a moment, contemplate the idea that we could lose all the freedoms that make us human in a literal race for our lives. But it happened and the impacts will remain life-changing. If we have all experienced one shared consistent emotion over the course of the pandemic I think it has to be remorse. For some that remorse comes from the realisation that they took advantage of so many simple freedoms, for others it’s remorse that they never made enough time for loved ones and for many it’s remorse that they never stopped to once take a risk and do all the things they were too afraid to do, forgetting just how short life is. On a personal level, the pandemic has further cemented my belief in the “Seek Discomfort” mantra championed by YouTube group “Yes Theory” and has pushed me to share it with others.

For those unaware, the channel was founded in 2015 by Ammar Kandil, Thomas Brag and Matt Dajer.

Over the years, the threesome have curated their now-famous “Seek Discomfort” philosophy. The basic concept of which is that the only way to obtain the most out of life and to keep truly growing as a person is to seek and indulge in the things that catapult you outside of your comfort zone.

For the group, this has included a host of experiences ranging from meeting with niche communities, visiting countries with less favourable representations and giving their people a voice to convincing strangers to take part in adventures on the other side of the world. The trio’s videos have earned them a legion of subscribers, 7.19 million to be exact. Their community, lovingly called the “Yes Fam” (for their willingness to say “yes” to discomfort), is global and members from all around the world partake in meet-ups and adventures with strangers who share the same mentality. I first discovered the group back in 2016 when I stumbled upon a video titled “Our Biggest Fear”. The video saw Dajer explore the disappointment he was met with from his parents after he made the decision to start the YouTube channel instead of pursuing a job on the back of his university degree. He went on to explain that as the channel began to grow and bring opportunities, he earned the support of his parents. “When you jump in and you say f*** it, this is what I’m going to do and I promise you it’s going to work, you find a way,” he says in the video. “That’s what we did and it worked for us. So, if you have this idea and it’s sticking out in your head and you need to get it out and you need to start working on it and the only thing that’s stopping you is the fear of failure or of disappointing your family, try to overcome it because you have no idea what’s going to happen and a lot of the time you’re gonna be so happy that you went for it.” That one video led me down a glorious rabbit hole of self-discovery. My discovery of the channel coincided with a major crossroad in my life, do I or do I not go to university? Since I can remember I’ve always been convinced I’m destined to tell the stories of others and as I grew older my love for words and storytelling left me adamant that my path was journalism. I remember ferociously researching as much as I could about the industry only to be met with a series of virtual closed doors telling me that my chances of “making it” in the industry - as a woman and person of colour - were incredibly slim, even if I were to attend a top tier university. Stubborn and ambitious, I stood firm in the belief that I could be the exception. However, I was aware that if I was going to do what few young, Asian, women had done thus far then I’d have to walk a different path to get there. So I decided to take a leaf out of the “Yes Theory” handbook and overcome that fear of failure and just go for it. I continued working hard on my A-levels, evidently wanting education to remain a safe back-up plan should I fall flat on my face in my pursuit for greatness. I then proceeded to explore all the other avenues that could help me achieve my goal, eventually landing on the idea of an apprenticeship. This would be a commitment that would require me to forgo a university degree. In return I’d receive unmatched experience in a newsroom, on-the-ground training and a non-degree journalism qualification. The prospect both terrified and excited me in equal measure. I made a decision there and then to actively pursue the apprenticeship route with unapologetic conviction. My goal was openly frowned upon by various teachers at my college who urged that I was very much on track to attend a top-end university and I should refrain from veering off-course. Ironically, their disdain for the path less travelled made me more sure than I’d ever been that this was the right course of action. Various opportunities came and went as I waited with bated breath hoping for an opportunity with a publication to come up. I vividly recall the moment, at 2am, when I stumbled across a role with a mainstream publication. I was beside myself and immediately began mapping out my application in my head. I remember hearing my brother come up the stairs when I accosted him mid-way to tell him excitedly about my revelation, to which he said, “let’s do it.” And I did. After several months, multiple interviews and weeks of being able to nearly taste the victory I’d longed for, I received a call that would change my life. “We’d love to offer you the position,” my future manager said down the phone. I wept. The job went on to gift me opportunities I could never have dreamed of as a fresh-faced 18-year-old.

I was repeatedly pushed outside of my comfort zone, thrown on jobs last minute, asked to visit new places, given the chance to share incredible stories with strangers who expanded my horizons, allowed to interview a host of A-list celebrities and attend red carpets.

Just like that, one bold move and a host of yeses had enabled me to quite literally live my dream. No one in education ever tells you how much power sits outside the boundaries of your comfort zone. It’s heart-racing, palm-sweating power that reminds you you’re not just living, you’re alive. More than five years later, with several new opportunities having come from that single decision, I can’t imagine what my life would have become without “Yes Theory.” The truth is, I was one “no” away from a very different world. If the pandemic has made one thing more evident than ever it is that you need to do the things you’ve spoken about but never mustered the courage to do, you need to go out on a limb, take a few risks, believe in the good of humanity and take the chance to walk a different path. Take it from me, you’ll be in awe of what sits outside of the known.